Scientific Jokes!

Science fun for all. Science fairs, homemade experiments, amateur microscopy, comics, puzzles, videos, or anything else you'd like to share.

Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby smfood on May 19th, 2015, 4:31 am 

LOL Give me more!
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby zetreque on July 29th, 2015, 8:08 pm 

Can someone explain. I know an ornithologist is a bird scientist. Are those bird collars/tags? Is this one of those jokes where there isn't really anything to get?

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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Darby on July 29th, 2015, 8:21 pm 

They appear to evoke brass crimp-on tags typically placed on the ankles of migrating birds.

Funny, but it overlooks the fact that the tags are typically on no value until they're recovered from the corpses of those wearing them ... kinda like the dog tags worn by soldiers.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Watson on July 29th, 2015, 9:40 pm 

They get banded instead of rings. Seems like more of an ornithologist club inside joke.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Watson on July 29th, 2015, 10:09 pm 

HaHa!!! Wedding bands.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby zetreque on July 29th, 2015, 10:18 pm 

bird bands wedding bands, got it. lol
thanks Watson, I missed that one. :)
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Watson on July 29th, 2015, 10:28 pm 

I didn't see it at first but as I walked into the kitchen it hit me.

Stop thinking about something and let your subconscious have a go at it.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Dudley on December 30th, 2015, 12:47 pm 

I read that the Dawn spacecraft will be left in a parking orbit around Ceres indefinitely. Fortunately there are no parking regulation in space. If there were, they'd have to go on forever, feeding coins to DeMeter.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Dudley on January 1st, 2016, 4:11 pm 

Joe, a time traveler from 1955, doesn't think we're doing so well in the 21st century. He says: 'Half the people I see are holding the side of their heads, and talking to themselves!'
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Watson on January 2nd, 2016, 12:54 am 

Dudley » Wed Dec 30, 2015 11:47 am wrote:I read that the Dawn spacecraft will be left in a parking orbit around Ceres indefinitely. Fortunately there are no parking regulation in space. If there were, they'd have to go on forever, feeding coins to DeMeter.


The coins tend to float away if you don't line up the coins properly. Feed de meter right, or not at all.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Dudley on January 7th, 2016, 1:50 pm 

The chemist must have been preoccupied with his work. He wanted to name his daughters Chlorine, Fluorine, and Ester.
Last edited by Dudley on January 7th, 2016, 2:16 pm, edited 1 time in total.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Braininvat on January 7th, 2016, 2:00 pm 

The guy was clearly a boron. His wife said, "Your head is all the way up uranium!" Then she called the police and, when they arrived, pointed out her husband and said, "Please cesium and take him away!"
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Dudley on January 24th, 2016, 6:16 pm 

Asked a geologist I know how he liked his new job at a quarry. He said its the pits.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby DragonFly on January 24th, 2016, 7:39 pm 

Dudley » January 24th, 2016, 5:16 pm wrote:Asked a geologist I know how he liked his new job at a quarry. He said its the pits.


His friend, an archeologist, replied, "My career is in ruins!"
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby AZPaul3 on February 19th, 2016, 10:43 pm 

"One benzene ring to rule them all,
One benzene ring to find them.
Six sigma bonds to bring them all,
And in the solvent, bind them."

Science: can tell you how to clone a Tyrannosaurus rex.
Humanities: can tell you why this might be a bad idea.

Do unto others 20% better than you would expect them to do unto you to correct for subjective error.
-- Linus Pauling --

How much room is needed for fungi to grow? As mushroom as possible.

"Don't drink that!" -- Old Chemist Proverb

Tectonic relationship:
H: There's too much friction between us!
S: It's not my fault!

For Valentine's Day: Blood is red, cyanosis is blue, I get tachycardia when I think of you.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Dudley on February 19th, 2016, 10:52 pm 

Someone asked an astronomer what he thought of astrology. Taurus! he roared.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Braininvat on February 20th, 2016, 10:46 am 

Virgo-ing to need that pun explained.
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby bangstrom on September 11th, 2016, 3:02 am 

Some ordinary compounds are cocaine, diamonds, and opiates. Here are some extraordinary compounds.
https://www.sciencedaily.com/releases/2 ... 103159.htm
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby Braininvat on September 11th, 2016, 11:10 am 

"....extraordinary compounds may be hidden inside Uranus..." Snicker!
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Re: Scientific Jokes!

Postby zetreque on September 4th, 2017, 11:23 pm 

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